Wednesday, April 09, 2014

Week 34

Dear Assalam Allam

As the FA rejected your proposed name change for Hull City, I have a cunning proposal. Let's change you name. Keeping with the orange theme, you are now  ..........

 
Assalemeti Allsam. 

Yes!! You can have your own badge with added guns and you don't need approval from anybody!! Well apart from Deed Poll!! And Warner Bros !!


This weeks FA "Stick your name change up your Ass-alam" is Harry with 22 points. This weeks rooting tooting gun totting Assalemeti is Sid with -1. Special mention for Stathis and congratulations on hauling back the leader and winning this years FFL. With 7 points from Eriksen this week, he is only one point behind.

No Transfers

Till next time.

Wednesday, April 02, 2014

Week 33



This is Sherwood Forest.

 
This is a piece of wood from Sherwood Forest. By sitting in the stands rather than looking at previous videos of the opposition and his own team he learnt so much against the scousers.
 
Can somebody explain to this soon to be piece of driftwood that no midfield bite means that the best teams will punish you harder and with less effort.
 
 
This weeks Tony Pulis is James with 24 points. This weeks "I can't see the wood from the trees" Sherwood is Mike with 4 points.
 
No transfers this week. 8 is the maximum.
 
Till next week
 
 

Wednesday, March 26, 2014

Week 32

Harry Kewell retires.


Apart from Champions League Finals I thought he retired 10 years ago !!

 
Stathis continues to eat into the lead with 24 points and team of the week. This weeks Harry Kewell is Donald with -7.
 
Transfers
Sid brings in Jordon Mutch for Jordan Henderson and Skrtel for Dawson
 
Til next time
 

Saturday, March 22, 2014

Week 31 Update

Please see list of players.
 

 
Stathis has 3 additional points. Not again !!
 
Till next time.

Thursday, March 20, 2014

Week 31

 
One of these two football geniuses is Blackpool's own Glenn McConnell.

 
"Glen who?" you may ask. Glenn of 13 England Caps, Glenn who plays for one of the most successful football teams in history with a Premier League Champions Winners Medal, Glenn who has represented Great Britain and the London Olympics. Ok then, Glenn who has played for Watford, Glenn who has a Championship winners medal with Leicester, Glenn who has played for England at Under 20 and Under 21 level.
 
No this is Glenn who wanks when he scores a decent goal on his Playstation and starts up a petition about Tom Cleverly not representing England in Brazil. If you are a Glenn and have signed this nobs petition, just realise how much Tom has achieved with his feet rather than you with your hands.
 
 
This weeks Tom Cleverly is Stathis with 14 points. This weeks Glenn McConnell is Theo with -2 points.

No transfers

Til next time

Thursday, March 13, 2014

Week 30


Not many points. No transfers.

Til next time.

Thursday, March 06, 2014

Week 29


"I think I should sit down in future" was Pardew's response to placing a loving kiss on David Myler. I think you'll be sitting down for at least 8 games in the comfort of your own home. He really should be driving a white van and playing veterans Sunday league screaming "Av It !!"

 
This weeks Morten Olsen "Good luck at the World Cup, You will need it" is Pork Chops with 16 points. This weeks Pardew and Butthead are Theo and Harry with 3 points.
 
Tranfers
Stathis bring in "Yeaks!" Flanagan for Cissokho.
 
Til next time.

Friday, February 28, 2014

Week 28

 
You're A Record Breaker !!

82: Defeats to Tottenham Hotspur, Swansea City and Sunderland have meant that United have lost their first three matches of a calender year in 82 years, dating back to 1932. Back then, Walter Crickmer's side were beaten by Bradford Park Avenue, Plymouth Argyle and Swansea City.

1974: United have now lost three encounters in the month of January. That hadn't occurred in 40 years.

22: Those matches have also resulted in United losing three matches in one week for the first time in 22 seasons.

2001: Sticking with the three successive defeats theme, that previously happened 13 years ago as Derby County, Southampton and Tottenham Hotspur came out on top against the Red Devils.

10: As for Swansea, they had never won at Old Trafford prior to their 2-1 success in the FA Cup - a sequence that dated back 10 matches.

20: Sunderland have also broken a hoodoo this year, having beaten United for the first time in 20 attempts. That triumph, back in 2000, was also in the League Cup.

1992: The year that Everton - Moyes's former club - last won at Old Trafford prior to this campaign. A goal from full-back Bryan Oviedo was enough for Roberto Martinez to do what Moyes had failed to do in his 11 years in charge of the Toffees - win away at United.

41: Yohan Cabaye's strike midway through the second half secured a 1-0 win for Newcastle United at Old Trafford, meaning that the Magpies headed back to Tyneside with all three points. It was the maiden time that they had done so in some 41 years.

1978: Laurie Cunningham and Cyrille Regis were among the goals when West Bromwich Albion last won at Old Trafford back in 1978. This time around, Morgan Amalfitano and Saido Berahino were the heroes as the Baggies ended a 35-year wait for a win. West Brom had also failed to beat United in 13 prior attempts.

8: Southampton ended an eight-match losing run against United courtesy of Adam Lallana's late equaliser in October.

26: From their 20 Premier League matches so far, United have dropped 26 points. Last season, they shipped 25 throughout the whole campaign.

25: The percentage number of matches that United have lost so far this season in all competitions - eight from 32. During the previous campaign, Ferguson's men lost 10 of 54.
 
Keep going David you're smashing all before you !!
 
 
This week's Moysie is Mike with 5 points. This weeks Big Sam Alladici is Theo with 20 points.
 
No Transfers
 
Till next time
 

Thursday, February 20, 2014

Week 27


First Wenger then Barcelona. After all the talk it would be an ultimate pleasure to see the disrespectful Moaninho walk away with absolutely nothing. Hopefully his "little horse" will be turned into glue before the end of the season.



This weeks Pelligrini is Theo with 16 points. This weeks "my little man talking pony" is McNick with 2 points.

Transfers
Harry brings in Adam for Pienaar
Sid brings back Nasri for Willian

Til next time.

Thursday, February 13, 2014

Week 26


Just like the Premiership healthy leads count for jack shit. It's all back on !!


This weeks Darth Vader is Theo with 22 points. 11 from the storm trooping Ivanovic. The Insidious McNick and Pieri both had 21 points.

This weeks Hans Solo was Sid frozen on -1.

No transfers.

Til next time.


Saturday, February 08, 2014

FFL Week 24 update

Apologies to Lord Ching.

He brings in Salah (Chelsea) for Morrison (West Ham)

Laters

Friday, February 07, 2014

FFL Week 24


Transfer window: Peter Ridsdale's guide to deadline day

Is this the most inappropriate headline of the year. Risdale giving guidance on transfers. This is like Bashar al-Assad providing peace keeping tips to Ban Ki Moon.The man who increased the value of Seth Johnson in transfer dealings. The man who whose "kid in a candy store" approach still has Leeds United reeling til today. The man who is disqualified as a company director for the next 6 years. What a flaming liberty !!
 

 
 
This week's Peter Risdale is Mike with 3 points. This weeks Ban Ki Moon is McNick  with 28 points.
 
Transfers
McNick brings in Nolan for Cabaye
Stathis bring in Oxlaide Chamberlaine for Ramsey
 
Til next time
 

Saturday, January 25, 2014

FFL Week 23

 
After  further discussions with The Winger, the Premiership has come up with some new football regulations
1) There shall be no purchase of players prior to sanction by the Winger
2) If a team uses one player in two games against the gooners they shall not be permitted to sell it to a rival
3) Footballers are not allowed to get physical against the gooners in any way shape or form
4) Teams are not permitted to play for a draw against the Winger's sides as this is not in the spirit of assisting the Gooners
5) Operation Yewtree shall not be extended to the Premiership
 
 
This weeks Jose "Cunning masterplanning ruler of the universe and controller of all players and forces within" Mourihno is McNick with 12 points. This weeks winging farts are the man u midfield quartet of Sid, Theo, Harry and Nick PC with 4 points.
 
Transfers
McNick brings in Adam Johnson for Sessegnon.
 
Til next week
 

Wednesday, January 15, 2014

Week 22

Return of the Hobbit

 
As the hobbit returns to Cardiff, he finds life is not going to be easy with Smaug Tan breathing fire up his arse. Losing six pointers to the Hammers is not the best way to kick off in the Premiershires.
 
 
 
 
This week's Gus Poyet is me with 28 points. This week's Frodo Baggins is James with 4 points.
 
Transfers
Sid brings in Henderson for Nasri and Willian for Walcott.
 
Til next time.
 

Thursday, January 09, 2014

Week 21

                               
                             RIP

 
This weeks Black Pearl is Stathis with 19 points. This weeks Three Stooges are Theo, James and Donald with three points.
 
Transfers
McNick brings in Bony for Crouch.
 
Til next week.

Tuesday, December 31, 2013

FFL Week 20


The best team in the world.


The second best team in the world??? Raja Casablanca. Never heard of them !! Its amazing what you can achieve in such a meaningless tournament. Having said that they have got a capacity of 65,000. Its amazing how many sheep you can fit into a football stadium.

 

This weeks Bayern Munich is Theo with 33 points with big contributions from Chelski at the back and his front two. This weeks Raja Casablanca is James with 6 points.

Transfers
Nick PC brings in Podolski for Boni.

Happy New Year and bring forth the transfer window!!

Tuesday, December 24, 2013

FFL Week 19

 
 

If its the middle of winter and you feel like  you need a bit of sunshine on your ass, avoid this type of Tan at all costs. It turns you from blue to red just because its lucky. Twat !!




This weeks Malky Mackay is me with 15 points. This weeks Vincent Tan is Donald with -1.

Transfers

Pieri pips Pork Chops on value for Adebayor with Podolski.

He also gets Sterling for Amalfitano.

Merry Christmas Boys !!

Thursday, December 19, 2013

FFL Week 18


Just like Suarez, Dr Evil has struck again. Time, faith and judgement. Three words that the Dr should consider in future.


This weeks Mr Rogers is moi with 21 points. This weeks AVB was Donald with -4.

Transfers

Stathis : Clyne out - Azpilacueta in
 


Saturday, December 14, 2013

Week 17




Enough said !! This little muncher got 21 points.

Team of the week with Sid with 27 points. Theo at the other end with -5.




Transfers
McNick
OUT Nolan IN Shelvey
OUT Cisse IN Crouch
OUT Bent IN Jay Rodriguez
 
Nick Ach
OUT Moses IN Schurrle
OUT Townsend IN Deulofeu

Tuesday, December 03, 2013

FFL WEEK 12

So, a third of the way through the season and we have a strong leader- Sid. His team has all it takes - players who play every week and appear to be at the top of their game - Suarez, Negredo, Nasri. And with Arsenal and Everton keeping clean sheets, he's going to take some beating. Here's the table:


Diff     Total Points
  1st Sid 152
11 2nd Harry 141
19 3rd Mike 133
26 4th Stathis 126
29 5th James 123
40 6th Nick Ath 112
42 7th Theo 110
54 8th Don 98
56 9th Nick Ach 96

One transfer to report:

Harry buys Navas for Sigurdsson.

Now, whose turn is it to take over the scores? I'm done for this season, well and truly.

Your outgoing Chairman